OK, so I’m not a Greek goddess, or gypsy princess (on the outside at least). My hair is greying and getting a little thinner in the temples and naps have suddenly become a VERY big thing for me. What I do for employment is what I would call “being all Nursey”. I poke people with needles, give people drugs, bandage them up and wipe poopy bottoms. That’s the crude, down-and-dirty side of my job as seen by much of the general public at least. The reality of it being that I can spend five minutes holding a dying persons hand, give comfort to an anxious parent, discover some previously hidden need for social work, and learn a little bit about the human being laying there in front of me. This is the montage between what I do and who I am while I’m at work and only a small piece of the weird and wacky ice burg-me floating under the surface.
I have, what my children would call, an addiction to books. I have owned and then re-owned perhaps 100 or so books that couldn’t make it in boxes through various moves. I currently own about 200 more. I have three bookshelves full at the moment and several books on-the-go that stay in bed with me…as if putting them on the bedside table would create separation anxiety. I have, as well, an addiction to Tarot cards. Of course I call my addictions collecting, because never once when I was drinking alcohol could I consider that behaviour ‘collecting’…lol. What do I love so much about my books and my cards? Well, my books are like a conversation I can put on hold while I attend to other things and come back only to have my books reply…”so, anyways, as I was saying….”. And as for my cards they are like spending time in a themed art gallery where the paintings tell an archetypal story of some poor sap who couldn’t be bothered to look down at the cliff he is about to walk over. I have experienced, in both my books and my cards a depth of feeling that I just can’t always get in the real world. According to my Tarot number, I am the hopeless Hermit who prefers her books and her solitude to keep herself happy. (Rather unfortunate sometimes for the people in my life…lol).
It’s not as if I haven’t tried to squelch the Tarot fiend within…. I’ve waffled between owning decks and then disowning them as I was prone to bouts of spiritual guilt and fearful that dabbling in cartomancy put my soul at risk. Hence the very schizophrenic look to my ‘altar’ where I have both Buddha and Jesus occupying space together. (For the record neither of them seem to mind). It actually came to a crisis moment when I felt I was being forced to choose. A crisis that was only averted when I heard that still small voice say, “why not have both?”
Why not indeed? If I am truly a spiritual seeker then there is room for all the truths put out there in the world, that includes the truths found in both the Tarot and the Torah.
As for this blog, I have loved writing and have had a couple blogs to my credit. They were, however, not fulfilling on a spiritual level and provided only a limited service to humanity. Not that my ego is so large that the world couldn’t live without me, but I have a glimmer of hope that what is written here can be seen as much as felt, and that by offering my words and my services as a Tarot card reader, that someone in need of that ‘something different’, might find it here.
Thank you for visiting,
Namaste, Amen, So Mote It Be